Changes

I thank you for bearing with me until I find my feet. Learn the technicalities. Yes, one of these days I will upgrade. "As above, so below…" How perfectly symbolic of where I am now in life. Perhaps now is a good time to introduce myself. Who am I? What do I do as my personal mould of interaction with the world around me? How do I exchange energy through my active participating in the community of the world. Well, yes, easier asked than answered.

 For how many years have I been searching to find "Who I am?",  "What is my purpose? My individual slot in the immense pattern of the Universal Mystery. What is the truth? "If it doesn't grow corn… cut it out." This you can only learn " By walking your talk." And it is a hard and painful road, let no one tell you otherwise. The rewards however are so incredibly liberating and so very precious to the richness of the soul, that it is well worth it. It makes life worth living even though there are times when you want to give up, just go to oblivion where there would be no more pain, just nothing. Then when you are at your deepest point of black, a miraculous thing happens. Suddenly you are hit with an inspiration that pulls you right out of the swamp of despair into the light of wonder. This is called a Christ experience according to Rudolf Steiner.

This works for me as a description of the Spirit of our times. We live in hard times. I do not know a single person who is not right now going through a painful inner and outer experience. Rich or poor. Our pain draws us in, looking for answers to questions our ancestors have not dared to ask. That which has been hidden in our darkest room. Yet to face these changing times we have to answer those questions or be driven mad by the chaos that surrounds us. Change is chaos. Yet change is life. As the wind is a carrier of life, "Heaven's Breath" so is change in our lives.

Let's face it the world has to change. Its systems are archaic inventions of a time that no longer has relevance to our present day and the requirements of lives. But it need not be massively traumatic, if we are willing to change ourselves first. Then the world would change to make life Human -friendly. I strayed completely. I just had a Christ experience and feel filled with inspiration.

Too much at once. I was going to introduce myself …not yet; I do not yet feel ready. I am still gathering myself together after the tumultuous changes in my life.

Facing the Dark Night I shudder and open my eyes
The darkness is coming
With dark foreboding
I stand up and face the approaching Darkness
This night,
This night is going to be the darkest coldest yet
A shiver runs through me
I want to be angry
Shout no I can't
But I know it is useless I must face the darkness
This darkness I must face Alone
Naked
Unshielded
Unarmed
Vulnerable
Open
Fear ripples through me
As the first fingers of the darkness touches me
Oh, I am so afraid
But not to face this night
Would be to live the life
Of the living dead
I pass through the threshold Of fear
A calm certainty enfolds me 
must enter the darkness
With only my inner wisdom to guide
Come darkness with all you hold
I am ready

tags: dark  night  spiritual  change